I apologize

I apologize
Milan Ford

I've been wanting to write to you for some time now.
Every time I would try, I never seem to find the right words to say.

We pass each other every Sunday. Sometimes even during the middle of the week.
But for some reason, I just don't feel like we are as close as we once were.

I'm sure there are a number of reasons for that. Both of us probably share some of the blame.
But I felt like it was my time to apologize for a few things that may have driven us apart.

I apologize.
For that time one of my ushers told you that seat was reserved for our "special guests."

I apologize.
For those times I said our evening services would end at 9pm, but ended at 10:30pm.
(I realize how difficult that can be with children that still have to get up early for school.)

I apologize.
For that time you called one of my leaders for prayer and never received a call back.

I apologize.
For sometimes being way too critical on how you choose to dress for service.

I apologize.
For those times it seems like I'm always asking for some kind of financial assistance.
(I realize how you and others give so faithfully. I just wish there were more like you.)

I apologize.
For the times I may have appeared interested more in gaining new members, than serving and being a disciple to those members (like you) who were already coming.

I apologize.
For that time your friend (the one you invited to come visit on last Sunday) got screamed at by one of my parking lot leaders for going the wrong way. She really didn't know.

I apologize.
For those times you had questions about some of my messages and were afraid to ask.

And I (Really) Apologize....
For the times you've felt I place too much emphasis on my pastor. I admit sometimes I allow things to get a bit carried away.

I can't imagine how many other things I may have done to make you feel the way you do. I never meant to disappoint you and want you to know how important you are to me.

If there is anything the last few years have taught me, is that I desperately need to make some changes. I realize I've picked up a pretty bad rap. So much so I was just about to quit.

I was just about to throw in the towel when I read in Ephesians 5:25, that that Christ loved me, and gave Himself for me (despite my many shortcomings).

I figured if Christ could love me, with all that I've done in the past, there may still be hope for the two of us. Although I can't promise everything is going to be perfect, I know that together, we still can do some great and awesome things.

I hope you will consider forgiving me and working alongside me.
We have so much to do.

Thanks for taking the time to hear me out.

Love,
The Church

Milan Ford is a 12-year leader (and survivor) of college and student ministry within the local church. He currently serves as Content Editor for Streaming Faith and as the author of "The Pew View" (www.thepewview.com), a blogspot for church ministry leaders.